via Facebook... Yup! Nerdy Wonka @NerdyWonka 30m Pres. Obama to Congress: Welcome to the adult's table. You want to weigh in on Syria, I want every American to see your vote. The end.
Saturday, August 31, 2013
Advice for my teen.
I have seen these floating around, and decided to make my own...
I preface it by my overall wish for my child:
I hope you have a career that challenges and engages you; that provides for all your needs and some of your wants.
I hope you are healthy.
I hope you find love and passion with the person(s) of your choice, who feel the same in return. And if you want children, I hope you can have them through whatever means work for you.
Now, for stuff I need my teenager to know:
_____________________________________
1. Don't worry about grades, they are arbitrary and once you leave high school no one will care that you stayed in to get an A--but you will care about the real experiences you may have missed.
2. Yes means yes. Enthusiastic consent, every step of the way.
3. Don't waste you time with clubs that you aren't interested in, and never think being good at sports make you important. Instead, find the few things you are really passionately interested in and immerse yourself in those.
4. Drive safely. I have taught you how and modeled that behavior for you. You will get into an accident--hope it's a small one, stay calm, and know I always love you more than the car.
5. Drugs and drinking are a part of life. I trust you to make your own decisions, and I've raised you to be your own person. You know the risks, you know the benefits. Be safe, and call me if you need me. You won't be in trouble, but I may spend a few years imitating your drunken attempts to get the key in the door. Be prepared for consequences.
6. I have taught you about finance. Get a credit card and use it wisely, to build up your credit. You will need debt to pay for school, buy a house, buy a car...and the better your credit, the better interest rates you will get. So use your card, pay it down, and don't get silly with buying power. But if you do go on a last-minute trip to Europe, remember to buy your mother something.
7. If I yell at you, yell back. You deserve to be treated with respect, and if I forget you are free to remind me.
8. Don't be afraid of being an adult. Every decade gets more and more awesome, more and more wonderful. What you are doing now is training for life.
9. Bucket lists are for people who forget to live now, and think that there will be a magical time in the future when they will finally be able to do all the things they wanted. Most people will die before that happens. Don't be one of them. Do it now, do it soon, make those things a reality instead of a distant fantasy.
10. "Them as can do has to do for them as can't. And someone has to speak up for them A's has no voices."
— Terry Pratchett
I preface it by my overall wish for my child:
I hope you have a career that challenges and engages you; that provides for all your needs and some of your wants.
I hope you are healthy.
I hope you find love and passion with the person(s) of your choice, who feel the same in return. And if you want children, I hope you can have them through whatever means work for you.
Now, for stuff I need my teenager to know:
_____________________________________
1. Don't worry about grades, they are arbitrary and once you leave high school no one will care that you stayed in to get an A--but you will care about the real experiences you may have missed.
2. Yes means yes. Enthusiastic consent, every step of the way.
3. Don't waste you time with clubs that you aren't interested in, and never think being good at sports make you important. Instead, find the few things you are really passionately interested in and immerse yourself in those.
4. Drive safely. I have taught you how and modeled that behavior for you. You will get into an accident--hope it's a small one, stay calm, and know I always love you more than the car.
5. Drugs and drinking are a part of life. I trust you to make your own decisions, and I've raised you to be your own person. You know the risks, you know the benefits. Be safe, and call me if you need me. You won't be in trouble, but I may spend a few years imitating your drunken attempts to get the key in the door. Be prepared for consequences.
6. I have taught you about finance. Get a credit card and use it wisely, to build up your credit. You will need debt to pay for school, buy a house, buy a car...and the better your credit, the better interest rates you will get. So use your card, pay it down, and don't get silly with buying power. But if you do go on a last-minute trip to Europe, remember to buy your mother something.
7. If I yell at you, yell back. You deserve to be treated with respect, and if I forget you are free to remind me.
8. Don't be afraid of being an adult. Every decade gets more and more awesome, more and more wonderful. What you are doing now is training for life.
9. Bucket lists are for people who forget to live now, and think that there will be a magical time in the future when they will finally be able to do all the things they wanted. Most people will die before that happens. Don't be one of them. Do it now, do it soon, make those things a reality instead of a distant fantasy.
10. "Them as can do has to do for them as can't. And someone has to speak up for them A's has no voices."
— Terry Pratchett
11. Vote. Serve jury duty with pride. These are your civic duties, and rights that we lose if we do not use.
12. Protest. March. Write and call your representatives. Demonstrate. Be vocal about things that matter. Write letters to the editor and opinion pieces.
13. Being a follower isn't all bad. You can't be a leader in everything, and you may not be a leader in anything. But chose who follow wisely. Remember when we marched on Washington? We were following people. Remember when we protested for voting rights? We were following people. And to be a good ally to those who are oppressed you MUST follow them, it is never your job to lead them--they know how to lead themselves, thank you very much. Ask what they need you to do, and then do it.
14. Family and friends are important. Always be there for them. However, you have no obligation to anyone--including me--if they can't treat you with respect and dignity. I never have a right to control you, and when you are an adult my role is to advise when asked, and support when needed. You do not have to prove anything to me, or make me happy, or live up to my standards--you need to be accountable to yourself, not me. It's your life, live it.
15. Be happy.
16. Some things aren't worth doing well. Some things are better when you half-ass them, so you can spend time on those things that you want to do well. This is why I don't make my bed or fold my underwear, by the way. Everything doesn't have to be perfect.
13. Being a follower isn't all bad. You can't be a leader in everything, and you may not be a leader in anything. But chose who follow wisely. Remember when we marched on Washington? We were following people. Remember when we protested for voting rights? We were following people. And to be a good ally to those who are oppressed you MUST follow them, it is never your job to lead them--they know how to lead themselves, thank you very much. Ask what they need you to do, and then do it.
14. Family and friends are important. Always be there for them. However, you have no obligation to anyone--including me--if they can't treat you with respect and dignity. I never have a right to control you, and when you are an adult my role is to advise when asked, and support when needed. You do not have to prove anything to me, or make me happy, or live up to my standards--you need to be accountable to yourself, not me. It's your life, live it.
15. Be happy.
16. Some things aren't worth doing well. Some things are better when you half-ass them, so you can spend time on those things that you want to do well. This is why I don't make my bed or fold my underwear, by the way. Everything doesn't have to be perfect.
Friday, August 30, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... YAY! High Point, N.C. — "High Point police canceled an Amber Alert just before 9:30 a.m. Friday, saying only that Shylin Olanda Neal, 1, was found and is SAFE."
Thursday, August 29, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Morning Pirate snuggles. With added bonus facial! The secret to clear skin :)
Wednesday, August 28, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Heading to Museum of the Albemarle to remember the March on Washington, and to move us forward...
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... So I was posting with someone about voter ID. She said "Sorry, people can only vote once" which has actually nothing to do with how people vote in this state... And after I pointed that out all she can say is "Typical liberal". Because that is an argument? Can you not even google something relevant and at least pretend you know something about this?
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... So, for tonight's gathering/protest...do I wear my Planned Parenthood shirt OR my March on Washington 50th Anniversary shirt?
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... NC is now ranked 50 in teacher's pay and education funding. #ncga #MoralMonday
Tuesday, August 27, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... There is ice cream. I am pretty sure I need some before bed. Almost positive.
Monday, August 26, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Okay, I'm going to watch Miley's 'performance'...if I'm not back in five, call the Coast Guard for a rescue... #VMA
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Last night I slept well, so now I'm tired but can't sleep. When I try to sleep I'm wide awake, but when awake I want to sleep. #insomnia
Sunday, August 25, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Was home by 10:20. This ending a 19.5 hour day which included 4.5 hours of standing, followed by 2.5 hours of marching. Followed by a painful metro, car ride, car ride to home.the sitting was good, it was the getting up to change transportation modes that hurt! A 19 and half hour day. Plus fifty years. Today my teen and I marched on Washington, for jobs and freedom. For voting rights. Economic justice. Women's rights. Immigration reform. We marched to stop racism profiling. Stop & Frisk. We marched for more. We marched for everyone. Speak up, speak out. Stand up, get up, and walk forward. Forward together NOT ONE STEP BACK! To sleep now. To dream of a world that doesn't need March and protests...
Saturday, August 24, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Last leg of the journey home. ETA one hour. #mow50 was amazing, powerful, emotional...so glad we went.
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Among the luminaries who spoke today: Ms. Evers Cory Booker Eric Holder Congressman John Lewis Minority House Whip Nancy Pelosi The families of Emmet Till and Trayvon Martin Martin Luther King III Al Sharpton But my favorite? Also the youngest speaker, Asean Johnson, a 9 yo student from Chicago who has been protesting the school closings there, and who have a fierce and fiery speech about education.
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Resting a bit before trekking to the metro. Will post pictures later. #mow50
Friday, August 23, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... This is me, still awake. I tried the "write stuff down so you won't forget it" except I keep thinking of new things to write down.
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... This is me not sleeping. Worried I am forgetting something. Made pb & j sandwiches with extras for others. Water and Gatorade. Snacks. Sunscreen. Clothes laid out. Charger. GPS. I need to sleep! Although I will have plenty of time in the car to snooze. There is that. I just need to wake up, dress, and grab everything that is already packed.
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Going to be signing off early...need to leave by 3 am to get to DC for the March on Washington! Whoohoo!
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Dear Kathy, Timber has informed me that instead of 300 kisses a day he needs 400 kisses a day. When I told him that seemed excessive, he insisted that--instead of fine print--the contract I signed has fine smells which he says requires 400 kisses a day. Now, obviously, I can't smell the 'fine smells', but I can smell a rat, and I just wanted to double check if this is accurate... Thank you, Soft Lady
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... "The bitterest tears shed over graves are for words left unsaid and deeds left undone." -Harriet Beecher Stowe
Thursday, August 22, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... #gilbert challenging black student voters...#elizabethcity #ecsu #suppressingvotes
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Just met Congressman G. K. Butterfield, shook his hand...waiting for The Rachel Maddow Show to start.
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... There is one piece of chocolate pudding pie in the refrigerator. One lonely piece.... What's that you say? You want me to get you out of the ice box? Are you sure, little pie? Well, it is warmer in my belly! Okay, just this one.... On nom nom
Wednesday, August 21, 2013
Saturday, August 17, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Heading to a party with a Doberman club! Always great to see puppies :)
Friday, August 16, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Propped up on pillows to keep my head upright and still. Watching Sherlock. Eating chocolate pudding pie. Surrounded by dogs and a cat on my feet. Small breaks for naps, Facebook, rests, and more Sherlock. If I'm too be in a spinning world, it may as well be cozy and full of comfort foods and cuddles
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... A person may cause evil to others not only by his actions but by his inaction, and in either case he is justly accountable to them for the injury." -John Stuart Mill
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Day 3 of the vertigo. Tried to do some yard work, almost face-planted. Avoided poo--yay! Back inside, keeping head very straight. This sucks! Also, dogs are really handy as stabilizers.
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... A Love Poem, by Timber Oh I'm in love Misha, She of soft reddish fur, But she glares when I try to get closer, And treats me like a no-good cur. Yes I'm in love with Misha, I drool when I sniff where she marks, And should a bike come by that threatens I protect her with fierce Tervie barks. Oh yes I'm in live with Misha But she'll never let me have that, So I share all my toys and treats from afar And run off to go hump the cat...
Thursday, August 15, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Also, my husband made chocolate pudding pie. With whipped cream on top. Not that said pie will be eaten. It lives in the fridge. For now
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Also, my husband Steve made chocolate pudding pie. With whipped cream on top. Not that said pie will be eaten. Not that it won't. I'm just letting you know it currently resides in the fridge.
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... I have discovered the Netflix. Starting Sherlock. If I'm not back in a few days have the power turned off and break the spell!
Wednesday, August 14, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Note to self: when you have vertigo do NOT toss head back when taking meds. Seriously. A Very Bad Idea.
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... "They defend their errors as if they were defending their inheritance." -Edmund Burke
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Holy wibbly-wobbly room, Batman. The vertigo has struck! Like being seasick on land. Ug.
Monday, August 12, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Fallout: New Vegas. DLC. I left the Sierra Nevada with all 37 bars of gold, oh yes I did! Who's got two sore thumbs and a safe full of treasure? This girl :)
Sunday, August 11, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Today's agenda: Throw ball for Timber. Cuddle with dogs. Play Fallout: New Vegas. Repeat as necessary.
Friday, August 9, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... "There is a loftier ambition than merely to stand high in the world. It is to stoop down and lift mankind a little higher." -Henry van Dyke
Thursday, August 8, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... "IKEA’s New Catalog Lets You Try It Before You Buy It" http://feedly.com/k/1bfO4Pl YAY!
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... RT @exileinflyville "#noALEC mood changed quickly: "just like NATO, took 10 mins to turn from peaceful protest w. unions to cops attacking people" - @samwiseeyes"
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... RT @K9Psychologist "Mix a Newfoundland with a Bassett Hound, you get the Newfound Asset Hound. A dog for financial advisors."
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... RT @quotepage ""Indifference and neglect often do much more damage than outright dislike." - J. K. Rowling"
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... RT @jesseltaylor "If the GOP only wants their debates carried on Fox News and AEI live streams, who are we to stop them?"
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... "Most institutions demand unqualified faith; but the institution of science makes skepticism a virtue." -Robert King Merton
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... In a mood. It was implied that I am not capable of educating a teen into adulthood. However, since I already did it, kind of a more point.
Wednesday, August 7, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Groan! edgarwright @edgarwright 13m Can't wait to see 'Thor' in November if only to air my premiere joke one more time: "Thor was great, afterparty was a bit Loki."
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... There is a cat sleeping on my left foot, and a dog using my right foot as a pillow. Meaning I'm trapped until they move.
Tuesday, August 6, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Mosquitos dined on my ankles, now I am one huge itch. I need more toads, spiders, bats, and wasps to kill the mosquitos. #enemyofmyenemy
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Seeing your state (North Carolina) featured on the Daily Show is painful. Thanks #ncga for making out state a nation laughingstock. We have out-regressed every other state.
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... A friend of a friend has a Dogo Argentino that was having a few behavior issues. Barking at the fence, not coming in from the yard without a chase...she was frustrated and a 'trainer' had recommended a bark collar and some other interventions... I sent her a few links to positive sites to teach a basic recall and to interrupt barking, offered a bit of advice, and today I got this message: "Who is this wonderful, awesome dog!?! He has done a complete 180! He comes when he's called, and listens right away! Very little barking and stops when asked! THANK YOU!" I cried. I love when a dog can stay in his home, and when people find an effective way to communicate with their pet. <3 this!
Monday, August 5, 2013
Closing clinics
"Spurred By Anti-Choice Lawmakers, North Carolina’s Health Department Cracks Down On Abortion Clinics" http://feedly.com/k/12UDnl5
Bad enough that SB353 threatens to close all but one clinic, they are working to keep that one shut, too.
Damn them.
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... "Five Egregious Ways Police Are Seizing Property From Those Never Accused Of A Crime" http://feedly.com/k/194T2B7
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Have you heard of a vodka called Firefly? It is a sweet tea flavored vodka. When mixed with lemonade it is yummy. Around a bonfire, more so.
Sunday, August 4, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... RT @cerebus19 "LEGO Monty Python & the Holy Grail. Zoom in for awesome detail. pic.twitter.com/NDtDvXDheD"
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... RT @cerebus19 "LEGO Monty Python & the Holy Grail. Zoom in for awesome detail. pic.twitter.com/NDtDvXDheD"
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... A couch that converts to a bed is the best place to lounge on a rainy Sunday. Two dogs fit easily, plus room for a cat or three. Plus a me.
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... I am awake. My brain seems to still be sleeping. Need MOAR PUPPY CUDDLES. And first nap.
Saturday, August 3, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... "Twenty Years Of In-Tents Treatment: How Sheriff Joe Arpaio Put Racism On Display" http://feedly.com/k/16OtJNN
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... "Pakistan's 'Burka Avenger' Cartoon Stirs Controversy" http://feedly.com/k/16SDQBj
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... "Bill Moyers: 50 Million Go Hungry Each Day" http://feedly.com/k/1b3zXfY
Friday, August 2, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Too many crappy sleep nights catching up. Hoping for a solid 8 or 9....Good night!
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... How can I hurt thee? Let me count the ways... Close a door on my foot... Which makes me stumble and catch my leg against the corner of the counter. Punching myself in the face when my hand slipped while struggling with the fitted sheets. My kindle falling forward off the pillow it's propped on and thwacking my lip. I'm going to bed. It's safe there. Except for the kindle thing. Also, chocolate will happen. Milky Way understands me. Milky Way accepts me as I am.
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... RT @MissRavenSymone "I can finally get married! Yay government! So proud of you"
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... The proper way to peruse an Ikea catalog: Step one: go through, page by page, and use small post-its to mark those items you will come back to.
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... "How beautiful it is to do nothing, and then rest afterward." -Spanish proverb
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... "STUDY: Mexican Men Are More Likely To Cross The Border If They Think Immigration Law Is Unjust" http://feedly.com/k/11xK21K
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... "Federal Court Strikes Blow For NCAA Player Rights" http://feedly.com/k/14nGNOd
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... "Illinois Becomes 20th State With Medical Marijuana Law" http://feedly.com/k/1bPOyzo
Thursday, August 1, 2013
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... RT @BreakingNews "Ariel Castro sentenced to life sentence without possibility of parole on aggravated murder charge - live video"
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... RT @GottaLaff "Castro: "Thank you everyone. Thank you victims." <-- He seriously just said that."
Justice
"Justice is what love looks like in public"
An alert pops up on my computer...It's July 2, and the NC House has just attached an anti-choice bill to an anti-sharia bill. My 17 yo stepson sits next to me on the couch, patting my arm and listening to me rant.
"I'll go put gas in the car," he says, "What time do you want to leave?"
We start the three hour drive the next morning. Among the way we discuss being arrested. To ask for a lawyer, say nothing else. Don't fight or resist. Call your Dad, he's waiting by the phone...we don't know what we are heading into.
We were heading into the most amazing experience of a lifetime.
"Tell me what you want, what you really want...JUSTICE!"
Moral Monday had become a driving force in North Carolina, and was moving into national awareness. Gathering up those from every walk of life, it served to contrast with the decided immoral actions of the legislature. Voter suppression laws, some of the worst in the country. Cutting unemployment in half. Education cuts that demolishes any illusion of caring for the children. Bringing back fracking. Allowing guns on playgrounds...the list is long.
And here we were, two atheists from hours away. And we belonged.
Our first Witness Wednesday
"Tell me what democracy looks like...THIS IS WHAT DEMOCRACY LOOKS LIKE"
We walked around the crowds of thousands, gathering signatures on a petition. We passed out buttons and signs. We stood in the sun and the heat, and when Rev. Barber, the leader of the NC NAACP, asked us to turn to our neighbor and thank them and make sure they were okay in the heat, we did.
My baby. "Do they realize that I'll get to vote in October when I turn 18?" he asks me, "Do they realize I won't vote for them?"
NC Legislature hurting thousands
"A people united can never be defeated"
We are standing a vigil in front of the governor's mansion. Cars honk and people wave as they drive by. Tomorrow McCrory will actually talk to us--after signing the anti-abortion bill--by walking across the street with a plate of chocolate chip cookies, and say, over and over, "God bless."
But today we standing vigil, my teen and I. A reporter comes by, does her interviews...she asks my kid "So, has being here changed anything for you?"
His eyes flash. "Yes, my goals have changed."
"Oh? How so?"
His head turns, and he gives the mansion a hard stare. "One day I'm going to live in there," he says, then turns back to the reporter, "and I'm going to help change the world."
"Forward together"
The crowd was well over 5000 strong. Pride flags waved next to Veterans for Peace flags. The red shirts were the teachers. Pink and purple was Planned Parenthood. The ACLU was there, so was Greenpeace. The NAACP was organizing everything. Religious leaders of all stripes were there. So many causes, so many people...united for justice.
We march through Raleigh. Ten across. It took 20 minutes for us to get to the street. Before us, behind us...people. We pass the legislative building...
"Tell me what hypocrisy looks like? THAT is what hypocrisy looks like!"
The March was lead by many of the over 900 people who had been arrested for civil disobedience in the previous weeks. Standing with them were those legislators that had fought against the bills being pushed through.
Moral Mondays in Review
"Read the end of the story..."
"I'm part of history." says my teen. "Look at all these people. I've gotten fired up at sporting events, but this..." He takes a breath, "this is amazing."
The march ends in front of the Capitol building. "Do we have to go home yet? I want to go back to the vigil in front of the mansion."
I am tired. Sore. My kid is asking to spend another few hours in front of the governor's mansion with a bunch of strangers. To speak up for women's rights.
"Of course we can go back!"
There are those who think religion is the only basis for morality. Who think a person without beliefs can have no moral compass.
"FORWARD TOGETHER"
Justice is the basis of morality. Speaking out against injustice is a moral duty. Holding your government accountability is how we protect our rights.
"NOT ONE STEP BACK"
What did we do on our summer vacation? This atheist, homeschooling family did civics in a big way. We marched. We protested. Signed petitions. As part of a larger community. For all our human rights. This summer a child became a man--because he understood human dignity. Because he stood up when others back away. He exercised his constitutional rights on behalf of others. Civics 101? Been there, have the t-shirt. Seriously, he has the t-shirt.
"FORWARD TOGETHER, NOT ONE STEP BACK"
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... How I am so brave, by Timber... This morning The Big Dog in the Sky started barking! He was loud, and right in our backyard! Misha got nervous and crawled over Soft Lady's head, because that is the safest place in the world... But I went to the window and I BARKED and I BARKED and I BARKED! And you know what? The Big Dog in the Sky MOVED AWAY! Pirate Dogs are so fierce even Sky Dogs tremble in fear. Misha asked me what the bright flashes of light were from, I think it's the Big Dog in the Sky's name tag reflecting... Grrrr...I'll keep the skies clear over my yard! Also, we went and marked high up along the fence line, as an additional warning. I'm going to need to drink more water...
Darlene Pineda
via Facebook... Tried to sleep. Failed miserably. I shall pin crafts I will never craft and recipes I will never cook...
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